The imprisonment of the Indian couple in Norway
had brought forth the topic of brining up children by the parents, rights and
responsibilities of parents and rights of children. Children are innocent and do not understand
the consequences of their acts. It becomes the responsibility of the parents to
guide them. This requires lot of
patience. Children sometimes unknowingly
do acts that upset parents socially and emotionally. Young
parents, under stress sometimes punish kids severely, often injuring the child
physically or mentally. Severity of
punishment causing physical or mental trauma is due to lack of awareness in the
parent.
To take up any skilled or intellectual job, appropriate
education and training is mandatory. Parenting
is a serious intellectual and skilled job often taxing physical and mental
abilities. But, generally it is taken as
natural phenomenon. Other than human
beings, this is quite natural and lasts only until the offspring learns to move
on its own and learn to procure food for it.
Human parenting is more complicated in this ever changing world. Parents always want their child to be the
best in the society and wants to train, often overburdening the child’s
abilities. Inability to conform to
parental requisition often leads to mental disturbances in the child. Lacking intelligence and physical strength to
protest the child suffers. This suffering
will have a bearing on the behavior and character of the person in future. Family environment, love and affection
showered by the parents, along with their type and extent of punishments will
impact the child’s ability to adjust in life and society in future.
In India
it is considered that parents have all rights on the children, any time they
have to abide by parents’ decision. ‘Spare
the rod, spoil the child’, is very much imbibed in the Indian psyche. To control the child from doing undesirable
things, often, physically traumatizing punishments are given. They forget these often leave mental
scars. Usually in joint families elderly
members intervene in such conditions. In
the nuclear families, ambitious young couples, sometimes, do not understand
their limitations in treating the children in difficult situations. People outside the family intervene only when
things are gross. Whatever may be the
difficulty in bringing up the children, inflicting physical injury is seriously
bad parenting. In such condition, the
family, parents and children need good counseling.
Education and maturity of the person and giving birth to
child only when desired goes a long way in bringing up children. Also, preconception and postnatal counseling
preparing for parenting and to cope up with its stress will be helpful to young
parents.
The Indian couple, being young and living away from native
land, trying to adjust to different culture might have had immense stress. To live with a child with mental compromises
could have made them to take extreme steps so as to make the child disciplined
and well adaptable as to his age and place. The extent of physical trauma, resulting
mental agony and fear of parents in the kid is really pathetic. This situation did rise because of the lack of
understanding in the couple. They did
need some strong counseling. The kid though
scared still attached to parents.
Separation of kids from the parents is traumatizing to entire
family. This again will affect the children
in their development. By now the couple
had learnt their lesson. Separation of
children from parents is becoming punishment to children also. I hope the couple will be released earliest
and take care of the children with lots of affection and understanding.
A child with all the experiences since birth will grow into
a man/woman. This will have a bearing on
their parenting. ‘A child is the father
of a man’.
